


Out of My Head

by Shamelessly_Radiant



Series: Aparecium [3]
Category: Harry Potter - Fandom
Genre: (Drabble), F/M, Physological Trauma, Prompt Fic, Relationship Issues, kind of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-08
Updated: 2015-07-08
Packaged: 2018-04-08 07:58:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 793
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4296855
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shamelessly_Radiant/pseuds/Shamelessly_Radiant
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Prompt fic written for the song 'Out of My Head' by Digital Daggers.</p><p>How do you walk away, when all you want to do is stay?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Out of My Head

**Author's Note:**

> I asked for prompts and the lovely Tomione fandom on Tumblr obliged.
> 
> Written for cocoartistwrites ( cocoartistwrites.tumblr.com ) who writes too, check it out. Prompt was 'Out of My Head' by Digggital Daggers, I hope this is kind of okay.

**_i._ **

"No, Tom!" she screams, and it's ugly, and her voice comes out like a screech, but she  _can't_ anymore.

"No, no, no," he mimics, "and yet you always stay. Never go"

She wants to slap him for his mocking tone, but instead she curls in, breathes in, out, shakes her head softly. There is a flicker of concern on his face but she ignores it.

"Sometimes I wonder, how much of it was true?" self-deprecating amusement, and she pretends her voice does not break, "You know.. I always have liked masks. But now- what's the point of loving something truly beautiful, but empty? Full of lies?"

She shakes her head, blinks because she refuses to let the tears fall. Simply refuses.

It seemed so good at first, and yet she cannot remember what it feels like to not be dying inside.

**_._ **

_There was a time where she only saw light when she looked at him. There was a time where his tongue tasted like honey and she craved every drop, always hungry for more. A time where she listened to his words, wide eyed, amazed._

_He had not yet noticed her then, and the first time she approached him he just looked at her blankly._

_The second time however.. the second time he smirked, all white teeth and sharp, and licked his lips slowly, raking his eyes over her._

_She had thought of him as salvation._

_But then he pulled her under._

**_ii._ **

"Tom Riddle," he smiles, offers her his hand, "we have spoken I know, but I don't think we have ever been properly introduced"

"No, we haven't" she nods, smiles back, grasps his hand, "I'm Hermione. Hermione Granger"

"Hermione.. mythology or Shakespeare?"

"I think it may have been a bit of both"

"All the better," he raises his eyebrows, "more depth. More history"

She should have known right there. She should have run away from the moment he wrapped his hand around hers and refused to let go.

Hermione always had a weakness for handsome men. A handsome, brilliant man? Recipe for her undoing.

And indeed, the following three days she isn't able to get him out of her head. And when he texts her, after asking Harry of all people for her number, it is the start of something magnificent.

**_._ **

_She fell in love slowly, and then all at once. Everything in her life was Tom, Tom, Tom. He burned the world around her and she admired the flames. He drowned her in him again and again and again and she marvelled at the water. He swept her up, carried her away, and her heart was his._

_(too bad his heart was never hers)_

_And she should have known. Flames are beautiful, but once they devour everything they just disappear.. and only cinders are left._

**_iii._ **

A month later, he has a key to her apartment. Three months later she has one to his. Four months later they simply buy a new one together.

She could not escape him, even if she wanted to. She is wrapped up in him, and he is everywhere and she cannot run, cannot run.

He only needs to run his fingers over her skin to get her to burn for him-

Somehow they both forget burning kills.

**_._ **

_A porcelain cup. Beautiful at first, with little roses on it and a golden edge._

_But after a while, it is no longer treated with so much care. The roses whiter, become less vibrant. The gold chirps away. It bumps into thing, gets dropped._

_First a crack. And then.. the porcelain simply_ _**shatters** _ _and there are only pieces left._

**_iv._ **

Hermione hates not being able to be in control. But she finds herself losing it slowly. There is a mask he wears she can't get under, and she is afraid to even try.

There is this dark side she can't handle, and she is afraid.

Because everything hurts now. And it kills her.

She doesn't want to die inside.

**_._ **

_Letting go. Walking away._

_It's easier said than done._

_Hermione knows,_ _**she knows** _ _, she needs to leave, needs to get him out of her head._

_She has tasted the venom on his tongue, knows how toxic it is that she always craves more._

_But god, she wants to_ _**stay.** _

**_v._ **

"I can't do this anymore, Tom" she whispers, and it sounds tired, dull- broken.

" _Hermione_ ," he whispers and he sounds wrecked.

She tries to fight it, she really does. But she knows, there is no getting him out of her head.

And she turns back.

**_._ **

_His heart was an obsession, never a possession. But she craves it, she craves it._

_She cannot get him out of her head._

_At this point, she doesn't even want to anymore._


End file.
